Undercover VB Knocks Off Craft Award

Hipsters cry foul as VB proves which is the Very Best.

No matter which way they try to spin it, the Craft Beer hipsters of Australia were put back in their box recently at the Surry Hills, Sydney Craft Beer Festival, when their doyens voted VB the convincing winner of Best Beer at the festival.

The self proclaimed “Experts” on beer were totally embarrassed, and exposed as wankers when their pallets exposed them to the truth. A truth that Bevans have alway known … That VB stands for “Very Best”.

Below is a full report courtesy of    STANLEY WORTHINGTON | Sydney Correspondent |Betoota Advocate

Be sure to click the link after reading the report and see the comments.

VaucluseBitterCarlton & United Breweries, a subsidiary of Foster’s Group in Melbourne, have today confirmed that the winner of last month’s Sydney Craft Beer Festival was in fact one of Australia’s oldest and highest-selling beers – Victoria Bitter.

The undercover infiltration of the October 24th festival took out number one place by an undeniable margin and in turn embarrassed the entire craft beer community of Australia.

Rebranded under the trendy guise of Vaucluse Bitter, the judges and punters could not stop talking about this ‘amazing beer from a tiny microbrewery in Sydney’s east’. However, those present at the Festival in Surry Hills were completely unaware that they had been made for fools in a bold marketing ploy by one of Australia’s biggest brewers.

After sending in two undercover sales reps to the festival to offer tastings in a quiet corner of the Giant Dwarf theatre in Surry Hills Cleveland street, VB presented itself as a family recipe created by ‘two brothers from Byron Bay’.

The revelations have enraged all that were present on the day, with the competitors embarrassed to lose to a mass-produced ‘corporate beer’ and many venue-owners left red-faced after having stocked their venues with ‘Vaucluse Bitter’ taps.

surryhillscraftAll present at the festival were fooled by VB’s cunning strategy
Victoria Bitter (more commonly known as simply VB) is Australia’s only billion dollar retail beer brand, selling the equivalent of one slab every second. At one time VB sold twice as much as any other full strength beer and was the only Australian beer brand that is in the top 3 sellers in every state. Victoria Bitter held the highest market share of all beer sold in Australia for more than two decades. It is these kinds of mass-produced products that many micro-brewers feel are a dying breed when it comes to Australian beer. VB have proven that this is not entirely true.

The espionage was a simple yet clever intrusion to the contrived community of capitalist hipsters. The VB logo was changed to look less professional with a cartoon-style version of the original branding. The red and green colours were swapped and ‘Victoria’ was replaced with ‘Vaucluse’ – presenting the beer as the product of basement microbrewery from Sydney’s East, created by ‘two brothers from Byron’.

The undercover logo (right) was not too different to the original (left)
Inner-west craft beer enthusiast and former microbrewer, Banjo Clementé, was one of five judges on the day – he has since spoken out about the embarrassment.

“It is just so typical of these big corporations, they couldn’t cop the idea that our microbreweries might begin to compete with them on the main stage… they had to come in and cut us down to size,”

“Looking back, I was mainly impressed mainly by Vaucluse Bitter as a rags to riches story, it wasn’t necessarily about the taste, turns out they weren’t as cool as I thought.”
Clementé has explained that the ‘suits’ from Cartlon & United went the whole nine yards to fool Sydney’s hipsters by wearing plain T-shirts from Rivers and torn jeans.

“They even grew their beards out, they looked the part. It’s disgusting see the lengths these corporate pigs go to keep us down,”

“They won by fluke, we are interested in a recall.”
A spokesperson from SAB Miller, the parent company to Carlton & United was very keen to give comment this morning

“It just goes to show how much of a joke this microbrewery ‘culture’ is. Everyone knows there is only one way to tackle a hard earned thirst,”

 “We won this round, and we will win again. This craft beer bullshit is just a phase. Long live the green demons.”

Bathurst 1000 History

Mount Panorama Bathurst 1000

Bathurst Origins

The Bathurst 1000 (currently branded as The Supercheap Auto Bathurst 1000) is a 1,000-kilometre (620 mi) touring car race held annually on the Mount Panorama Circuit in Bathurst, New South Wales, Australia. The race concept originated with the 1960 Armstrong 500 at Phillip Island. Since then annual races have taken place in a continuous sequence at these two venues. It is known among fans and media as “The Great Race” and is widely regarded as the pinnacle of Australian motorsport. The Bathurst 500/1000 was generally a “stand alone” event, occasionally becoming a round of a national series such as the Manufacturer’s Championship. Since 1999, the race has been run exclusively for V8 Supercars and is now a round of the V8 Supercar Championship Series. The race was traditionally run on the Sunday before the first Monday in October, which is the “Labour Day” public holiday in N.S.W. In recent years it was held on the second Sunday in October; the 2012 V8 Supercars race calendar changed it to the first Sunday in October.

Race winners are presented with the Peter Brock Trophy. This was introduced at the 2006 race to commemorate the death ofPeter Brock. Brockie, as he was affectionately referred to by race fans, was the most successful driver in the history of the race, winning the event 9 times. He was also one of the most popular and approachable competitors during his long career.

The Mountain

The Mt Panorama Circuit was originally created as a Scenic Drive. During the 1930s it was expanded with Government funding as part of a Depression era job creation scheme. It had a gravel surface prior to World War 2. It has been a venue for many classes of Racing Cars and Motorbikes. Motorbike racing was traditionally conducted at Easter meetings though they have not competed at Mt Panorama since 1994. When not closed for racing the Mt Panorama circuit is a two way public road. The speed limit is 60km/h. It is remorselessly enforced.

Initially open wheelers and sports cars were the dominant classes raced at “The Mountain”. During the sixties they were usurped by the increasingly popular Touring Car categories. The 1968 decision to allow advertising on Racing Cars accelerated this trend as “Tin Tops” were much better billboards than the smaller and swifter “proper” Racing Cars. Factory support from the major marques (Ford, Holden, BMC, Nissan, Toyota, etc) aggravated this trend during the late 1960s and early 1970s. The increase in television coverage and promotion from the late sixties onwards helped to make several of the drivers household names across the country.

Until 1998 the Bathurst 1000 was organized and promoted by a consortium of Channel 7, the Australian Racing Drivers Club and Bathurst (City) Council. Since then it has been run on a more professional basis.

Currently two meetings per year are held at Mt Panorama; The Easter “12 Hour event” for a variety of classes and the October “Bathurst 1000” for “V8 Supercars”.

Article courtesy of Wikipedia

Browse the gallery below for some classic images of the beginnings of the Bathurst Legend.

Australia Day 2013

Happy Australia Day.

Australia Day is the national day of Australia and is celebrated every year on the 26th of January to commemorate  the landing of the first fleet at Sydney Cove, New South Wales in 1788.
 It was previously known by other names such as Anniversary Day, Foundation Day and ANA day.
 Some Aboriginal activists would have it named as Invasion Day, however thankfully they are in a minority.
As the original races who made their way into Australia over many tens of thousands of years, fought each other for their bit of Australia, winner take all; so did Europeans.
Our mode of grabbing a foothold on the shores of this great country are similar. Therefore how can European races be called invaders and the various “Aboriginal” tribes not? 
 Their ancestors arrived a different times over 40 to 60 thousand years ago from different countries to the north of Australia and as they followed each other in over the land bridges from Africa, Asia the northern islands, they took the land they wanted from whoever was on it, if they could. So what is the difference; it is how all Peoples got to their lands down through the ages.
 Rather than bicker about who came first (As nobody knows) lets let Australia Day signify the coming together of all Australians willing to commit to our heritage and way of life.

 Let the criteria for being Australian be a commitment to our way of life, our culture, and a continuing contribution to the greatness of our magnificent country. Don’t attempt to pull it down with your jealousies and your bitterness and laziness. Stand on your own and contribute or shut up. We’ll look after you if you can’t contribute; but at least have a go mate.

 Perhaps in deference to all sensitivities we could change the commemoration date to a happier day for all, or perhaps we could have no specific date, just the last weekend in January and always a long week-end. It should be a favorite holiday for all Australians. Cutting through religion, race and politics. Who knows it may eventually generate good will between all Australians as Christmas is supposed to with Christians.
 Happy Australia Day! I’m off to have a beer with my Wog, Abbo mate.

Australian Culture

Australia Mate. .. Love it or piss off.

Australian Culture .. Our Icon.We love our Australian Culture and our life the way it is. The way we are is how the majority of us want it to be and how we want it to remain. We don’t want to change our lives to accommodate uninvited grubs who use the freedoms we grant them to impose their religious and political shit on us. We believe that the only time that we should change our way of life is if we want to live in their country,which is highly fucking unlikely. So if you want to live in ours embrace our way of life or leave.

Now before I go much further and before people start branding me a hypocrite, I will address the subject that is bound to come up. Indigenous Australians. How is the fact of Europeans coming to Australia over 212 years ago and changing that culture any different to what some immigrants are trying to do in Australia today?

Firstly I say that trying to change the culture of the Peoples that were here then was wrong, and that successive Governments over many years have changed that. Today the Aboriginal culture in Australia is embraced and anyone wanting to live that culture and partake of it, as we all do to varying degrees, is quite able to do so, with the added advantage of a safety net provided by our current system. Which I might add is used up to fucking ying yang.

The vast majority of us through the efforts of our forefathers and our own ongoing perseverance in developing the Australian Culture, insist on continuing our great and very unique Australian life style and this includes our indigenous Australian brothers and sisters.

Many different races from all over the world have come to our country and made it their own, they have been granted our freedoms and  contributed to our life style without trying to change the fabric of it. They continue to be proud of their origins while embracing a new culture which is uniquely Australian.

However, increasingly some of our recent migrants bring their political and religious garbage with them and it spills over dangerously into our society and clashes with our Australian Culture, changing the peaceful landscape that we cherish. We are seeing violent mob scenes on our streets which are foreign to our culture and abhorrent to our social fabric. Ethnic gangs are forming in our cities like never before, committing murders, violent crime of all types and turning some of our lower socio-economic areas into war zones. This is unacceptable and we will push back.

Previous ethnic groups which have made Australia home, Chinese, Italian, Greek, and other European races have taken Australian values on board. They have controlled their youth and raised them to be respectful and industrious. They have worked and studied hard and contributed greatly to the nation. This is in stark contrast to many of the African, Middle Eastern and Asian enclaves in our cities today.

Governments need to tackle these problems head on, not pussy-foot around with political correctness. They need to be strong against people who can’t accept Australia for what it is. Refuse them entry, come down hard on their militancy, show no tolerance for anti-Australian behavior and make integration a mandatory condition of their entry into our country. We need to make religious and cultural leaders responsible for weeding out and reporting their militants to authorities, or punish them as accessories. If we are having continuous problems with one religious or cultural group, cut them from our immigration intake.

If strong steps are not taken to harness these problems, violent reaction will be seen by Australian groups as we saw with the Cronulla Riots.

We refuse to step lightly around precious religious bullshit. They need to step lightly around us in our country.

We will not be made feel unsafe in our financial institutions or any other place of business by someone hiding behind clothing cover-up.

Why should we have to search the labels of food in the supermarkets to see if it was prepared by some religious method or other. Why should we be compelled to understand and adopt their culture, when they make no attempt to understand and except ours?

Why should we miss out on our traditional Christmas or other traditional celebration songs so as not to upset a small group of inward looking, fucking whingers? I like Christmas carols in shopping centers and I’m offended when we bow to them and change our traditions.

Why should our schools respect their bullshit when they don’t respect ours.

Why should we put up with riots every time someone says something derogatory about a religious figure? What sort of world would we live in if we had mayhem on the streets every time someone lampooned Christianity?

Why do you lunatics come to our country and try to change it. Why not stay in your country and change it.

I think Pat Condell sums up the feelings of the vast majority of Australians in the video below.